Story Time: In the infancy of my coaching career I was coaching a youth club team in the shadows of a division 1 University that had a storied men’s soccer program. I was a college student who didn’t know much about the game but I wanted to learn. The director of coaches at the club, I’ll call him Fred, I worked with was one of the assistant coaches at the University. He was an intimidating person to be around for a brand new coach like me and he definitely knew what he was doing. His job was to manage the coaches and make sure the teams were cared after.
Most of the coaches in the club were either older coaches who had been at the club forever and “thought” they knew what they were doing. Some of the coaches were hothead college students who used to be “great” players wherever they played youth soccer.
Then there was me… I was an ok player who played for mediocre teams and didn’t have exposure to the sport at a high level. Actually, soccer wasn’t the sport I was most talented at, it was just the sport my dad didn’t know much about so he couldn’t be the overbearing father and tell me everything I was doing poorly. That sport was tennis, and believe me, he made sure he coached me at every opportunity he could.
Fred would come out and observe us coaching our respective teams. Any time he came to my training session I was extremely nervous. I was about 19 years old and I had a division 1 college coach looking over my shoulder critiquing me. And trust me, Fred would make it clear there were things that I needed to fix in my coaching style. There were definitely a few college courses I paid zero attention to because I was more concerned about making a practice plan in fear that Fred would show up at my practice session.
One evening I was out at the field coaching my team and Fred walks over. Fred stood off to the side and watched me for a while as I ran my session. After the team was given a water break, Fred walked over to me and asked me how it was going. I told Fred I thought it was going well and felt proud that I had a session planned out and I felt everything was running as expected. Then Fred threw me a curve ball. Fred asked me what time it was. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and told him the time.
Fred shook his head, called me a “donut,” and told me never have my phone out while coaching. Fred told me that he watched me pull my phone out on several occasions during my training session to check the time. He explained that my focus should be on the players I’m coaching, not on my phone. He let me know that watches aren’t expensive and that every coach should wear a watch while they are on the field during a training session. I apologized to Fred after the session was over.
The next practice session I had Fred was there to watch me. Not surprisingly, I had a watch on my wrist. Fred actually stepped in and coached part of my session that evening to show me some things. During the session, Fred pulled out his phone to check the time. I noticed he didn’t have a watch on his wrist… I was stupefied. After the session I asked Fred why did he not have a watch on his wrist. Fred chuckled and told me that when he is coaching there is a scoreboard or an assistant that keeps the time for him. I recently checked out some MLS footage and saw that Fred still doesn’t wear a watch. He’s been a coach in the MLS for the better part of 15 years and he must still have a scoreboard or some random helper that lets him know how much time he has.
Fred taught me a lot of things in the time that I coached at the youth club that he was responsible for. First, Fred taught me that all coaches are under a microscope. I was a college student that was trusted with coaching guys that were only a few years younger than me. The perception of looking at my phone multiple times during a training session could be taken in the wrong light. Second, Fred taught me that being “coachable” is not only for players, it also counts for the coaches. Fred showed up to more of my sessions than any other coach at the club. I wanted to learn, and Fred saw that and he kept showing up to my training sessions to teach me things that he knew. Fred knew that I had an open mind to learning and while I may have not been the most experienced coach, I was willing to listen and improve. Lastly, Fred saw that I cared. I could ask Fred to run a session for me and he would be there ready to coach my team and teach me something new. What a great experience that was spawned from a simple question of why I used my phone instead of a watch.
As a coach, remember that what you do in front of your team and the public matters. Furthermore, you ask your players to be coachable… but are you?
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